646f9e108c The teenaged descendant of Professor Van Helsing must fight an ancient demon named Simon Magus for control of a powerful sceptor. As if it wasn&#39;t enough to have the troubles of everyday teen life in high school, Michael Harris has just learned that he is the last heir to Abraham Van Helsing, his great great grandfather, a relic hunter who aquired the scepter of god, a biblical artifact forged by an angel before the birth of mankind, and is now being sought after by the very being who created it! Spoiler Alert!<br/><br/>Young Van Helsing is an Excellent film for one reason and one reason only, but you knew that already. Yes, that reason is the shining face of the smiling young man playing Preston. It&#39;s TJ Sicilia! When TJ&#39;s visage loomed onto the screen at our local drive-in, all of the teeny-boppers and bobby-soxers jumped out of their trunks and backseats to do those funky cosmic jigs of the 50&#39;s and 60&#39;s. And so will you! Once you see this film, you&#39;ll want to give TJ/Preston all of the cookies and lemonade, not just some! He&#39;s got raw, bleeding, steaming pulsating charisma and star appeal. He makes the lights in the sky separate and become liquefied, and that&#39;s a guarantee. There&#39;s a reason you this movie only cost $3, and that&#39;s because it&#39;s horrible. But there&#39;s no excuse for it being sold at all. Vampires are on the loose, and only bad acting can stop the onslaught. Wait, no, apparently bad special effects and writing will do it too. This might be a fun movie to mute and talk over though,it won&#39;t distract you with a stimulating plot or anything. One chick is hot,longyou don&#39;t listen to her and imagine her naked, and hot.<br/><br/>Here&#39;s an example of how bad this film is, they use a CD playera countdown to the final confrontation. When it spins like crazy, the vampire&#39;s are coming!!! And of course, it only spins like crazy.
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364 weeks ago